The seven deadly sins in relationships

So I was watching a film about the seven deadly sins when it suddenly occurred to me that if these sins were applied to relationships today, some of us would be in for a rude awakening. I tried a couple and realised that each of the sins could and would probably lead to the end of the relationship. Common sense huh? You would think, but so many of us go through life failing to apply what are really very simple rules for life regardless of your beliefs.

Pride: You call yourself a proud person but the results of your pride leave you unable to deal with many situations effectively. You are too proud to recognise a problem in your relationship because you have to believe that you are always right. You cling on to your right-ness for so long until you lose your partner. Then blame him/her because pride does not allow you to look at yourself and your wrongdoings. Funny thing is, if you stepped back and viewed your situation without the pride distorting your vision, you would realise that you had fallen. And what comes just before a fall?…..right!

Pride comes with his cousin, Vanity and she allows you to focus on yourself and even start to believe that nothing you do could ever be wrong. Whichever one you are, proud or vain, the results are the same. You lose.

Envy: It is the envy amongst us that makes us unhappy with our lot, that makes us think the grass is greener on the other side. Think about it, we get unhappy with our partners as soon as we hear how somebody else is being treated:

Tony’s girlfriend makes him dinner every day
Then you need to go and live with Tony’s girlfriend!!

Envy does not allow us to be happy. When you are envious, you get stuck in a trap created by your own imagination. You begrudge someone else’s good fortune without thinking about how they got where they are. If your neighbour gets a nice new ride, you secretly hope it will get stolen or at the very least scratched by some other over zealous and jealous neighbour with a penchant for making straight lines using sharp edges! Just as you look at other people’s material possessions with envy, your undermine and even reject the person that loves you, to chase someone else’s life, all the time not seeing that the problem isn’t that he has a better wife than you; the problem is you don’t recognise what you have got until it’s gone.

Gluttony: You want the nice car, the nice house, the trophy wife and kids, the multiple holidays each year abroad, the golf membership and all the cash in the world but you spend so much time at work that you don’t get to enjoy the fruits of your labour. By the time you look up,  from feeding your desire for more, more, more, another man is driving your wife in your car and enjoying your silk sheets in your master bedroom. On holidays your wife spends most of her time with the kids and you spend most of your time asleep or ‘connected’ to the office. That golf membership becomes the only thing you actually have left and you play that with a bunch of guys all in exactly the same boat. Life is about balance and gluttony destroys that  and with it your  life. Too much of everything doesn’t leave any room for anything.

Not to be confused with…

Greed: You have everything you could possibly want in life, but that is not enough. One car is not enough…you want seven!!! You go on a mad spree to collect as much wealth and material things as you can. You are greedy for things and you are greedy for people, suffocating your partner 24/7/365. You want all of their affection, all of their time until they can’t give anymore. You see with greed there is selfishness and you are blind to other people’s needs.

Lust:  Perhaps the most dangerous, lust will get you in trouble, everytime. You’re out with the fellas and that nice girl keeps smiling at you. Before you know it, you’re talking and drinking with her. The rest as they say, is history..and an ugly break up!  Sexual lust is easy, we’ve all been there at least once. But there is a type of lust that makes you argue long after you have lost the fight or an insatiable lust for success, more riches, for love , for better working conditions, the list is endless – that’s the lust that will control you and destroy you.

Anger: In life and in love, anger  is your worst nightmare. Shouting, cursing, hitting, breaking, smashing…the list is endless and the damage irreversible.  Some of us lash out with our words, some with our fists. Some of us destroy with our silence, express our anger passively, seething and slowly sucking all the air out of the room, all the time claiming nothing is wrong.

Sloth: Any of you out there with a partner who avoids work at any cost? Just stays at home all day chatting with her girlfriends or playing Pro Evo soccer with the boys. At first you don’t mind the burden until it dawns on you that this person is still sitting in the same place 8 hours later, smelling of a combination of cheetos, ass, sweat and pepsi. Sloth also shows itself in a person’s attitude: ‘Just can’t be bothered’, ‘I’ll do it tomorrow….if its not raining. ‘ The excuses never end, there’s one for every occassion. If you hear these kinds of excuses then you have already been visited by the sloth monster and it needs to be kicked to the curb!

Sometimes it pays to review your attitudes against timeless principles like the deadly sins, you might just be surprised to see how many negative habits you have allowed yourself to fall into.  

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