The Great Big Valentine’s Day Lie


Valentine’s Day is nothing but a lot of sentimental crap and lies which does a poor job of masking failing relationships, for a day at least.  I know I know, what’s wrong with dedicating a day to celebrating love I hear you ask?

Look, the truth is it basically gives us guys the chance to ‘apologize’ for our transgressions of the past 12 months with last minute flowers, a box of chocolates and a ‘surprise’ dinner for two. What really shocks me is why or how women have allowed themselves to be duped by the retail sector into participating in this frenzied commercial love fest.

I can’t speak for all guys but I reckon I can speak for most: ladies, we do the whole Valentine’s gig for the freaky gratitude sex that is promised afterwards. And if we’re being honest most of you women do it to show off to your friends and co-workers; you want to be able to boast about how ‘great’ we are because we spent some ‘quality’ time with your naked ass! Who wants to be the one that doesn’t get flowers delivered at work or in front of some other captive audience? Not you I’ll bet!

This Valentine’s poses an even greater challenge -the credit crunch will separate the men from the boys; true love from a poke in the dark with a grateful host. Let’s face it, less credit means fewer flowers, less dinners in posh restaurants and definitely no extravagant night in a hotel for you this year.

Money is the number one cause of arguments in relationships and divorce in marriages – even when the economy is stable. With the current situation, the pressure is significantly higher. So for the guy (or girl for that matter) who thinks expensive gifts are a substitute for affection or intimacy, reduced spending power is a big problem. The gold diggers will be exposed for what they really are and the guys with no game will now be guys with no game and no girl. Money can’t buy everything but in the mating game it helps…a lot.

This whole situation is sad for Valentine’s Day lovers. It totally undermines the tried and tested card + flowers + dinner (and maybe hotel) = guaranteed shag formula that guys have spent so long perfecting. Now how are we supposed to show our ‘love?’ Our piggy banks are low and the banks are not letting us raid theirs. Let’s face it, in our materialistic society no-cash-to-flash means there’ll be a lot of fellas getting a lot less ‘love’ from the ladies.

I know some of you ladies are crying fowl and claiming money can’t buy your love but you know that you never tire of getting overpriced shit that you didn’t have to pay for (not in cash at least.)You also know that on Valentine’s Day you will get pretty much what you want; guys are essentially held to ransom. It’s the Wild West all over again!

I’d love to be all romantic about this and say that even in this time of global financial crisis Valentine’s is all about love sweet love and you can’t put a price tag on it. Beautiful words, wonderful sentiment but the truth is that we’ve all been sold a big fairytale by Hollywood and the retailers – it’s all hype and you’re falling for it.

We spend lots of money because if we didn’t the hospitals would be full of men claiming to have missed a step or walked into a cupboard door! We keep playing the game and pretending that those overpriced roses show our love, the posh meal celebrates it  and don’t forget the kiss under a moonlit sky…(pass me the bucket…please!)

Forgive me for believing that when you truly love someone then you don’t need all that razzmatazz.  Everyday is a chance to enjoy and celebrate that love.  We need to grow up people, stop living for the hype and start having an honest conversation about real love and authentic relationships.

Each and every day of the year I celebrate love so to me February 14th is no different, it’s just another day.

So, think you can convince me that Valentine’s Day is more than a cheap excuse to manipulate men into spending money they don’t have, just so women can show off and Hallmark can sell more cards?  Make your point by posting a comment.



11 Responses to “The Great Big Valentine’s Day Lie”

  1. Mampo-bama Says:

    Little Miss – Next time, spend the day with your girlfriends, sometimes the “independent woman” mantra is better unobserved on Valentine’s Day. Get a group of your friends together and show yourselves some love, especially yourself! Go get a manicure or a pedicure, do a little shopping…You sure don’t need a signicant other to enjoy Valentine’s Day!

  2. Mampo-bama Says:

    Prekosifa – I share your sentiments on this one. Many people don’t celebrate Valentine’s day, instead show their love in other ways on a day to day basis. I think people who merely greet their loved ones with “I Love YOU”s the whole year through are more sincere than any candy, flowers or diamond rings can be – could it be that I’m too poor to afford all these, sour grapes:-) Valentine’s Day has become over-commercialised and I think St Valentine himself is turning in his grave knowing what a mockery a celebration in his name has turned out to be.

    About time we learnt that we are to be loving and fulfilled 365 days a year, and not reduce our affection to flowers, a box of candy, and a meal on one day a year, let’s leave “Commercialized Love Day,” be.

  3. WooHooGirl – I went to see the movie also and to be honest having read the book I thought it sold out a bit. Somehow situations that really should not have worked out because ‘he was just not into her’ were miraculously resolved just in time to serve us another big fat helping of romance (not) Hollywood-style.

    Where I think the movie does get it right, more so than the book even, is that there is no formula to the whole love/dating thing. You can’t control it or force it but if you let it, then quite often it does surprise you. Who knows, this time next year Prekosifa might be the #1 advocate for Valentine’s Day. Maybe not… LOL

  4. Honour, integrity, honesty, love, commitment, giving without expectation of receiving something in return, accepting something without feeling you have to give something back – wouldn’t that be just wonderful! Oops, that’s just a touch maudlin and there’s just a little bit of cynicism there thrown in with a dash of hope!

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